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I Hate Virtual Jarome Iginla, He's Ruining My Summer

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The lack of hockey and the constant beating Phoenix is taking right now may be taking it's toll. Look forward to more of these type of articles over the loooong summer.

We all know summertime can be a bit boring for all of us hockey fans. The playoffs have ended. The draft has come and gone. "Free Agency Frenzy" is almost completely over. Even NHL Network knows that there's nothing going on and so NHL Live is on hiatus until training camp. For those of us not in Canada that means we get very little televised hockey news. So what are we to do? Well, it really leaves us with few options for our hockey fix. I chose to fill this time by ordering an XBox 360 and NHL 09 to beat everyone with my Coyotes. There are some friends I can play online, but as a teacher on summer break I get to play dynasty mode during the day when everyone else is at work. I've had the game for all of 3 days and I've started to pick it up to the point I can usually beat the computer except for one damn team... the Flames.

One would think that this wouldn't be an issue. I can beat the Red Wings and Penguins, what's the big deal? Well sir or madam, the issue is one Virtual Jarome Iginla and his impossible friggin scoring. I get that in real life Mr. Iginla is a fine hockey player, captain of his team and generally a good guy. Heck wikipedia even describes him as "Known for his polite and generous nature..." That begs the question then, how can your virtual representation be such a jerk?  Are you getting virtual Mick McGeough to referee these games? Are you paying of the virtual NHL or my virtual teammates? Because that's what it seems like good sir. I get that you can score a lot in a season, you had 52 in 07/08, but getting my players to simply move out of your way seems a little fishy. Especially when I'm beating your team late in the 3rd and then you magically just skate up to my goalie and he gets out of your way. What did you do to virtual Ilya Bryzgalov's pregame hot dogs good sir?! Or have you mastered Star Trek type transporters to just make the puck appear behind my goalie, cheating me out of a victory. Whatever the reason (it surely can't be my defense), I don't like it. I don't like you either Virtual Jarome Iginla. In fact I hate you. Thanks for screwing up my summer you jerk.