Fowl for Yotes!!! Ducks fans jump on the bandwagon

Hello Yotes fans...My name is Spade and Im an alchoholic eeerrrr....ducks fan..I usually post in Battle of California www.battleofcali.com

my duckos...patos...have been eliminated...and I need a team to root for...since I still love hockey and not gonna watch baseball cuz its way too early and my dodgers look like crap anyways...

I was part of 5 for howling but I unjoined..dont remember why.?..maybe when you traded mueller and that sexy soul patch of his or when I started stalking shane doan and was court ordered to stay away from him...but whateva...I re-joined and had to annoyingly wait a day to post this...(moderarator..lemme know if im too vulgar Ill clean it up)

Alot of ducks fans are scrambling now to find someone to root for...and for damn sure were not gonna root for our damn rivals the Guppies(sharks) or the Queens..wed rather pound our testicles with a mallet

so a lot of ducks fans are jumping on the yotes bandwagon..and I realize a lot of you probably dont want us...but tough...your a scrappy young bunch..and Im about to list the reasons why we would want to:

Fowl for Yotes!! (thats our slogan)

Reasons why ducks fans are rooting for the yotes:

1. The biggest reason is Bryz:. Was a solid duck, went to war with us, won us playoff games..never complained..soldier..and the funniest mother f er..ever as im sure you guys are finding out...its a shame we weren’t able to keep him..he did win a cup but as the back up...would be nice to see him win it as the starter he deserves it...

 the bryz everyone knows and loves

go here for further proof of his awesomeness: http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/blog/puck_daddy/post/Video-Bryzgalov-talks-Detroit-pressure-does-R?urn=nhl,233912

2. we both hate wayne gretzky?:...ok im not sure if you do..and we shouldnt either cuz he probably is the reason the ducks exist today...but still he was a lousy coach and always had a dumb face on the bench  

you eat some bad shrimp mr great one?

3. young underdawgs: we were also once a young scrappy bunch(ok maybe not oates and steve thomas were ancient) in 2003 that no one gave a chance...Plus most people root for underdawgs anyways...wait wouldnt that mean we should root for nashville...um no we dont recognize them as a real franchise and we hate that city...so no...we do love there linebacker looking coach though..always have

4.your in the pacific division: hey we should root on our division right?..and were not rooting for those other two douchebag teams and dallas is golfing with us..but we hate them too...doesnt everyone hate them?

edit: what the fuck are the stars doing in a "pacific" division anyways?...you guys are at least in the same time zone and reasonable driving distance away from the pacfic ocean...so there not a real pacific division team..they should join a division with the red wings and be ugly and stupid together

5.you gave us Mr. Duck: This is also one of the top reasons...you gave us Mr. Duck...Teemu Selanne..hell be the first duck ever to be up in the rafters...hes Mr duck to us..that alone should be enough reason to root for you guys..this might be a sore subject (that trade).

6. your playing the red wings: this is a gigantic reason..EVERYONE hates the wings..and EVERYONE hates there fans even more (ive noticed here on this site already)..weve had the same douchery from there fans as youve gotten...there even worse in person..Ill never forgive there arrogance when they swept us 2 years...there "we do nothing wrong" "were entilted" attitude sucks jeavos and they should all eat shit and die...I think Ill buy a rubber snake to help your cause....I hope any wings fans that come into your arena with an octopus get some type of poisoning and pukes up green death and dies...

7. the cartoon bondage: daffy, donald and wiley e. coyote always get messed with...they never get any satisfaction...nobody really like them...so were in this together

8. proximity and city: only 6 hours away..so is san jose...(Ive been to both when I was previously in a band) and phoenix is waaay better...better people...better strippers...the fact you guys are that close and we could get tix if we wanted to watch playoff hockey is cool...I mean we could go the staples center..but we might get infected with some desease or might get propositioned by some manhooker...better to go to phoenix...awesome city..and san jose?...not much to that city really

9. Shane Doan is very fuckable: he rides horses also..that adds to his sexiness

(This one from John Q. Phats fellow duck commentor not I)

Good luck boys most of ducks nation will be rooting you on!!!

EDIT: when the hell u did u guys get Schiender?