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I Hate Virtual Jarome Iginla, He's Ruining My Summer

The lack of hockey and the constant beating Phoenix is taking right now may be taking it's toll. Look forward to more of these type of articles over the loooong summer.

We all know summertime can be a bit boring for all of us hockey fans. The playoffs have ended. The draft has come and gone. "Free Agency Frenzy" is almost completely over. Even NHL Network knows that there's nothing going on and so NHL Live is on hiatus until training camp. For those of us not in Canada that means we get very little televised hockey news. So what are we to do? Well, it really leaves us with few options for our hockey fix. I chose to fill this time by ordering an XBox 360 and NHL 09 to beat everyone with my Coyotes. There are some friends I can play online, but as a teacher on summer break I get to play dynasty mode during the day when everyone else is at work. I've had the game for all of 3 days and I've started to pick it up to the point I can usually beat the computer except for one damn team... the Flames.

One would think that this wouldn't be an issue. I can beat the Red Wings and Penguins, what's the big deal? Well sir or madam, the issue is one Virtual Jarome Iginla and his impossible friggin scoring. I get that in real life Mr. Iginla is a fine hockey player, captain of his team and generally a good guy. Heck wikipedia even describes him as "Known for his polite and generous nature..." That begs the question then, how can your virtual representation be such a jerk?  Are you getting virtual Mick McGeough to referee these games? Are you paying of the virtual NHL or my virtual teammates? Because that's what it seems like good sir. I get that you can score a lot in a season, you had 52 in 07/08, but getting my players to simply move out of your way seems a little fishy. Especially when I'm beating your team late in the 3rd and then you magically just skate up to my goalie and he gets out of your way. What did you do to virtual Ilya Bryzgalov's pregame hot dogs good sir?! Or have you mastered Star Trek type transporters to just make the puck appear behind my goalie, cheating me out of a victory. Whatever the reason (it surely can't be my defense), I don't like it. I don't like you either Virtual Jarome Iginla. In fact I hate you. Thanks for screwing up my summer you jerk.

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heh

When I first started playing NHL09 it was Robbie Earl that would hit the post 12 times a game thereby robbing me of 12 assists.

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Jul 7, 2009 9:02 PM MST reply actions  

Then screw Robbie Earl too. :)

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by Travis Hair on Jul 7, 2009 9:04 PM MST up reply actions  

Lol, funny post

I have NHL 09 for pc but I find it EXTREMELY easy! I have even downloaded a patch which is supposed to be the harder out there (it even makes the opposing players double-faster than your own) but I can still win easily. I just beat Vancouver for instance in the 2nd game of the Western Conference Finals 12-1!!! And all that without even exploiting the fake shot…

My body might be in Greece, but my mind and my heart is in Arizona. When the heck will I visit the Desert?

by Giannaros on Jul 8, 2009 12:03 AM MST reply actions  

It's really difficult on XBox

I don’t know why but you have to play like it’s real life. Cycling the puck and trying for an many garbage goals as possible. One timers don’t work anymore and i’m out of practice. It’s always close but Iginla screws things up…

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by Travis Hair on Jul 8, 2009 12:51 AM MST up reply actions  

Yeah the PC game is way different than the console versions. It hasn’t had a real update in years.

A Nation of Masochists TRUCULENCE!! It's not just a word. It's a way of life.

by furcifer on Jul 8, 2009 5:51 AM MST up reply actions  

I think the PC version is the same as the PS2 version that I have.

It’s basically been NHL05 with roster updates and different control schemes for the past 4 years. That being said, I still thoroughly enjoy it – although I wish you could download real-life roster updates from EA online.

by Jo4nny on Jul 8, 2009 7:41 AM MST up reply actions  

I bought NHL 07 for the PC even though I have a 360. They never came out with a roster update despite all their promises. I vowed never again.

A Nation of Masochists TRUCULENCE!! It's not just a word. It's a way of life.

by furcifer on Jul 8, 2009 11:23 AM MST up reply actions  

Ditto…it makes me truculent just thinking about it.

by Jo4nny on Jul 8, 2009 12:51 PM MST up reply actions  

Good game today...

Odin!!!1

Look forward to some more.

I’m off for the summer as well.

Here’s to afternoon XBOX. Cheers.

Sports And The City

A Toronto sports blog, where unabashed homerism is alive and well...

PLAYOFFS!!!!1

by eyebleaf on Jul 8, 2009 2:37 AM MST reply actions  

lol

great post!! :)

Jesus didn’t need a brother to be great. Neither does Luke Schenn.

by kessticle on Jul 8, 2009 11:12 AM MST reply actions  

odie, if the best

you can do with your summer is play xbox hockey…and lose…then you need another hobby….bungee jumping, freestyle shark tagging, HALO parachute jumping, skyscraper climbing….whatever….get a life, dude(lollolololol)

who will rid me of this damn priest?

by goldenbear64 on Jul 8, 2009 12:21 PM MST reply actions  

No no, I win, except against Iginla. THat’s why he sucks. :P

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by Travis Hair on Jul 8, 2009 12:29 PM MST up reply actions  

You could always just play the Flames instead, and enjoy winning. ;)

Hopefully the real Jarome Iginla does the same to the entire league this year!

by Resolute on Jul 9, 2009 6:37 AM MST up reply actions  

Real Jarome tends to do the same thing to the real Coyotes.

by Kent Wilson on Jul 9, 2009 8:46 AM MST up reply actions  

Nah, he racks up the assists, but only scored against us once last year.,

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by Travis Hair on Jul 9, 2009 9:57 AM MST up reply actions  

Do what I did, kept checking him until he gets injured. It’s also always amusing to slash him with the Y button after the play is dead. If things really get serious, you could always trade them Jovo and a 1st rounder and a prospect and get Iginla on your team, and then have Doaner and Jarome on the same line with Lombardi or Upshall centering. It’s always the ex-Coyotes that burn me… cough Langkow cough.

by AZHockeyDude on Jul 12, 2009 9:33 AM MST reply actions  

You should have got it for the PS3.lol I just lost the last game of the season with the lightning on my franchise. A win would have put me in the playoffs as the 3rd seed but I lost and the Panthers took the division. Grrrr Cant wait for NHL10

by Clenchfist24 on Jul 16, 2009 4:57 PM MST reply actions  

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