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Around SBN: The Worst Team Ever Projected?

Coyotes Commit to the Tank - Fall to Devils 5-2

Fatmatfinal_medium

Really? You could have fooled me tonight...

That was a pretty terrible game. Let's break down exactly what the Coyotes didn't do well. I could just say everything, but that's not really fair. They scored twice so I guess that's something. But overall a pretty poor showing. Upshall came to play again. He's been super since he came from Philly. Prust got into a couple of scraps so those that thought we didn't have a fighter anymore can dig that. After that though, not a lot of good to report on. The Defense was attrocious. They were turning over the puck, leaving guys wide open, it was ugly. While I know Jovo has some defenders is it a coincidence that he's on the ice for the first two Devils' goals? Not really. He's way up there in terms of the minus side of the +/-. THe checking game was around for about 5 minutes and vanished after that. It looked like they were starting to pack it in with maybe 6 or 7 guys actually playing and the rest just skating around. It's really got me thinking that someone will be sitting Wayne down over the summer to have a talk. I don't know who's in power to do that, but someone has to because this team looks horrible right now. Not that they have anything to play for anymore except for a better draft pick. They're doing a great job of it too, letting teams like the Islanders win and such. We're pretty much mathematically eliminated from contention though. If only the Avs could win a few games we'd be set. Tavares here we come!

Tank for Tavares / Hurl for Hedman / Cower for Cowen Standings:

Team              GP        W          L       OTL     PTS     GF         GA

NY Islanders 68 23 37 8 54 171 220
Atlanta 67 26 35 6 58 201 227
Tampa Bay 68 22 32 14 58 177 224
Colorado 67 29 37 1 59 178 211
Phoenix 68 28 34 6 62 168 210
Ottawa 67 27 30 10 64 173 195
Los Angeles 66 29 28 9 67 176 193
Toronto 69 27 29 13 67 201 243
St. Louis 66 30 28 8 68 185 196
Minnesota 66 32 28 6 70 171 162
Dallas 67 31 28 8 70 193 207
Anaheim 68 32 30 6 70 190 200
Edmonton 66 32 27 7 71 187 203
Nashville 68 33 30 5 71 173 189
Buffalo 68 34 27 7 75 200 189
Columbus 68 35 27 6 76 189 189

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i agree

i think that our new players have really shown up, especially upshall.. that line has produced a lot lately, but not enough for the W. or it might just be that the other lines play like they don’t care.

Phoenix Coyotes! Arizona Cardinals! Phoenix Suns! and the Arizona Diamondbacks!

by phoenixcoyotes17 on Mar 12, 2009 9:06 PM MST reply actions  

I wish we were that good at tanking.

/cries softly

"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into Iraq"
- Major Mike Shearer

by article1 on Mar 13, 2009 1:15 AM MST reply actions  

Sheesh, we can't even tank well

How can we let COL tank better than us? Srsly!

Watch, we’ll win enough to get 7th place in the draft and go off the board for the guy who should be in the bottom of the friggin 3rd round!

We’re not even doormats some nights, more like 3 year olds whose trailer trash parents feed us and the dog beer to watch us run around bumpin into stuff and falling down.

Takin over the NHL, 1 blocked shot at a time... Go Z!

by Monique Reaux on Mar 13, 2009 8:00 AM MST reply actions  

We can learn much from you

How is it you manage all those losses without the stupid (and tank-detrimental) point gained in overtime? If it weren’t for those, we’d be the tankiest! Teach us, please.

Newly appointed Awesome/Gin Division Head
I will try to use this power only for good, but I make no promises.

by Mabel on Mar 13, 2009 8:57 AM MST reply actions  

The key is to suck for the ENTIRE game. YOu really have to want it. You can’t slowly let the game slip away becuase you might wait too long.

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Five For Howling

by Travis Hair on Mar 13, 2009 9:27 AM MST up reply actions  

The key is to suck for the ENTIRE game.

Oh, that’s it. I knew we were missing something key. Thanks!

Newly appointed Awesome/Gin Division Head
I will try to use this power only for good, but I make no promises.

by Mabel on Mar 13, 2009 10:06 AM MST up reply actions  

It also doesn’t hurt to have Jovanovski on your team. He get’s assists on the other teams’ goals with regularity.

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Five For Howling

by Travis Hair on Mar 13, 2009 10:19 AM MST up reply actions  

Dammit!

We had one guy who could do that, but then we traded him to FLA for splodeybones v 2.0 (Mike Van Ryn). Who’dve thunk that McCabe could have helped the Leafs?

Newly appointed Awesome/Gin Division Head
I will try to use this power only for good, but I make no promises.

by Mabel on Mar 13, 2009 10:21 AM MST up reply actions  

here, here

(clapping hands and bowing low)…having jovo is like a guaranteed screwup or two every game…

the yotes 3rd uni sucks

by goldenbear64 on Mar 13, 2009 10:32 AM MST up reply actions  

avalanche

colorado should really learn how to lose in overtime if they want to tank with the best of em. I wish I knew how many overtime wins they had, but Im sure if they were around .500 in OT, theyd be right up at the top of the tank for tavares standings

by wiscopantherfan on Mar 13, 2009 9:51 AM MST reply actions  

they are 11-1 in overtime and shootouts! leading to a 18-37 record in regulation. thats about a 1:2 ratio, so they should have easly been able to sit on a 4-8 overtime/so record = 52 points

by wiscopantherfan on Mar 13, 2009 9:58 AM MST up reply actions  

Keep up the good work ;-)

Phx @ Col on April 1st could be an important Tank game :)

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Five For Howling

by Travis Hair on Mar 13, 2009 10:01 AM MST up reply actions  

i dont't think that

we are that good at tanking….lousy coaching, lousy trades, poor decisions led us to this point..if changes had been made earlier we might have still been in the hunt…but tanking…not too sure

the yotes 3rd uni sucks

by goldenbear64 on Mar 13, 2009 2:46 PM MST reply actions  

Oh you're probably right.

But since we can’t get rid of any of that now, i’m going with the sunny happier feeling story that we’re going to miss the playoffs so we’re tanking to get a really good pick. If we end up with #3 or 4 you better believe we’re gonna try and turn that and our other first round pick into # 1 or 2.

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Five For Howling

by Travis Hair on Mar 13, 2009 3:23 PM MST up reply actions  

sort of pathetic

that we are reduced to being chicago cubs fans….wait’ll next year….dayum

the yotes 3rd uni sucks

by goldenbear64 on Mar 13, 2009 3:27 PM MST reply actions  

Not yet...

We’re waiting for next year for now. But Next Year we’ll be waiting for nothing. THat’ll be easier if we have Tavares or Hedman :)

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Five For Howling

by Travis Hair on Mar 13, 2009 3:30 PM MST up reply actions  

odds are

we’ll be just good enough to slip into the 5-6-7 slot in the draft…

the yotes 3rd uni sucks

by goldenbear64 on Mar 13, 2009 3:45 PM MST reply actions  

Shut it!

We’ll have none of that talk here mister! If we’re not going to the Playoffs then we better tank our collective arses off! I’ll not have this ruined by your winning ways… ;)

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Five For Howling

by Travis Hair on Mar 13, 2009 3:52 PM MST up reply actions  

roflmfao!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you go, odie

the yotes 3rd uni sucks

by goldenbear64 on Mar 13, 2009 4:29 PM MST reply actions  

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Pacific Standings

GP W L OTL PT
San Jose 51 29 16 6 64
Los Angeles 55 26 19 10 62
Phoenix 55 26 21 8 60
Dallas 53 28 23 2 58
Anaheim 53 21 24 8 50

(updated 2.9.2012 at 9:35 PM MST)

26 - 20 - 9

Won 4

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